Sakura Mentor

How Does It Feel To Date a Japanese Woman
Lai Hung Wei Updated in April 2021

Konnichiwa and salam sejahtera! Temperature in Japan is gradually rising as spring approaches. I recently received several inquiries from SSC members regarding the dating aspect of Japanese women. As a foreigner with experience dating with Japanese woman, I felt obliged to share some of the interesting points of dating a Japanese woman. However, it is important to note that these are only based on my personal experience and might not be applicable to every Japanese woman out there.

AC Photo

When you are serious about dating a Japanese woman, the first thing you need to do is to make a love confession to her directly. The reason being it is very common for Japanese to hang out with their friends for lunch or tea. This is why, you need to man up and confess your love to her to recognize each other’s feeling. I have heard some Western friends complaining about their Japanese love interest’s reaction even though they have been hanging out with each other for quite some time.

It is quite uncommon for Japanese to show their affection in public. Japanese are relatively shy and sensitive when it comes to kissing or hugging in public. In my opinion, I think it is because Japanese values privacy highly and constant public awareness of not causing uneasiness to people around them. In short, if you took a step further other than holding hands together in public, you would probably get a slight glare and a soft “Yamete-yo!” from your girlfriend (just like I did).

Photo: Pakutaso

The third and perhaps the most shocking dating culture of all would be Valentine’s Day. In most countries, February 14th tends to be a day where women wait for an invitation from the guys to bring them on an unforgettable date. This, however, is not the case in Japan. On the contrary, it is more common for Japanese women to prepare a gift of chocolate* for the man they are interested in. The man would then give back a present to the woman a month later on March 14th, also known as White Day. This has always been used as a subtle way of confessing love to their crush. Therefore, if you are having a crush on a Japanese, please be sure to make use of these two occasions! Good luck!

*Some say that this was a marketing ploy by Japanese chocolate manufacturers…